Nonviolent Change Journal

This is an abbreviated version of the original article in the Jerusalem Post Magazine, April 3, 2003, where Eetta Prince-Gibson is a journalist for the Jerusalem Post: http://www.jpost.com, Distributed by the Common Ground News Service with permission for republication.

Israeli teacher Miki didn't think she wanted to talk. Palestinian teacher Ibrahim didn't think he wanted to listen. But in spite of their mutual distrust, both agreed to be part of a group of about 80 educators that went to Turkey in February to learn how to talk to each other.

Afterward Miki said, "I didn't know it then, but I really wasn't ready for any kind of dialogue. In my heart, I wanted to prove to the Palestinians that they are wrong, that they are terrorists, and that we, the Jews, are right."

Ibrahim said, "As a Palestinian, I really didn't want to hear how the Jews have suffered. I didn't want to hear that people they love have died, or that they are afraid."

Kobi stood off to the side, reading a mystery novel. Until almost the very last minute, he wasn't sure he would come.

"I was a combat soldier, and I've done reserve duty during this intifada. Friends of mine have died fighting Palestinians. I didn't know what I wanted to say, and I didn't know what I wanted to hear."

But his school adopted the "Pathways to Reconciliation" project, and he wanted to be part of it, so he had to come.

Ibrahim, a Palestinian educator from a village near Jenin, stood with the other Palestinians. They have different passports and had to go through a different security check. His attitude was a mixture of angry defiance and an almost-submissive fear.

This group of Jewish Israeli, Arab Israeli, and Palestinian teachers from the West Bank spent five days in Antalya at a conference entitled "Continuing Dialogue in Times of Crisis."

These educators will be implementing "Pathways to Reconciliation," a peace education program now in its seventh year in 60 Jewish and Palestinian high schools, sponsored by the Israel/Palestine Center for Research and Information (IPCRI).

For many of the Jewish participants, it was the first time they had met a Palestinian who was their social and professional equal. For many Palestinians, it was the first time they had met an Israeli Jew other than a soldier.

"This is the first time I ever felt equal to Jews," said Ibrahim. "Most of the Jews I know are soldiers, and they are more powerful than me. They have guns and they rule my life. They decide if I can pass through a checkpoint or if they will shoot me. In the discussions, I felt equal, so after a while, I felt less angry."

But equality is difficult.

"One of our roles as facilitators," said Fakhira Halloun, an Arab from northern Israel, "is to help the participants realize how complicated these issues are. Both sides feel powerless, and both sides have power, but it's hard for them to acknowledge this."

Explained Michal Levin, who co-facilitates with Halloun: "Without facilitation, Israelis and Palestinians will just reproduce the usual kinds of power relations, with endless cycles of mutual blaming and attacking. I believe that people want an opportunity to experience themselves in a different way, but they are also afraid. Our job is to help them, sometimes despite themselves."

It wasn't easy. Noah Salameh, a Palestinian facilitator from Bethlehem, is director of the Center for Conflict Resolution and Reconciliation. During the first intifada, he was arrested and spent 15 years in jail. Because of security restrictions, he is the only participant who wasn't allowed to come through Israel, so it took him three days to arrive in Antalya.

"Facilitation is demanding, draining, and rewarding," Salameh said. "As a facilitator, I have to neutralize my own feelings and experiences in order to create an atmosphere in which the group members can express theirs. It is very hard but, if in the end they have learned something, if they have grown in their ability to listen to each other and promote peace, then I feel rewarded and satisfied."

It didn't take long before conflict appeared, as people introduced themselves by telling about their personal pain and suffering. Jews talked about fear of terrorist attacks, their disappointment that there really isn't "anyone to talk to" on the Palestinian side. Palestinians talked about the checkpoints, the degradation and humiliation, and the disruption of all normal life in the territories. Everyone talked about death, destruction, and loss.

Halloun observed: "There is always a paradox here. On the one hand, participants say they want to hear the truth from each other. But the truth is painful, and so they start to feel guilty, and don't want to listen. It is a struggle."

By the middle of the fourth day, members of the group were ready to try to solve problems. But first they had to learn to look at conflict in a different way - in terms of needs, not in terms of demands, positions, or stands.

Said Levin: "When you learn to restate a problem in terms of needs, not in terms of positions, it is very liberating. People learn that their position is merely one way of trying to meet their needs - and it may not be the best one."

Some were able to reach agreements so creative they would impress official Palestinian and Israeli negotiators. Others were stymied and frustrated. Not everyone learned to be empathic, not everyone could listen, and, even after four days of dialogue, not everyone wanted to.

Yet on the last night the mood suddenly became fun and festive, almost manic. Despite the reality that they were about to return to, many of the teachers began to dance debkas and rock together.

But then they returned to reality. When they entered Ben-Gurion Airport, the Palestinians from the West Bank were separated from the Israelis and underwent an additional security check. The entire group stood and waited with them, even though everyone was eager to go home.

The Day After

'The meetings changed my life. I met the Israeli enemy, and I know that we share a common humanity. I hope I will be able to pass this experience on to my students and my family," reflected Ibrahim, a Palestinian teacher, two weeks after returning from the conference.

The cost for the five-day conference came to well over $60,000, sponsored by a grant from the US State Department. These programs are funded as part of the "People to People (P2P)" project. P2P was created under the 1995 Interim Agreement of the Oslo Accords, based on the idea that "politicians can sign the peace agreements, but the people have to make peace happen."

"Pathways into Reconciliation," IPCRI's peace-education program, is one of the larger P2P programs. Introduced seven years ago, it now operates in 60 schools (30 in Israel and 30 in the Palestinian Authority), with the participation of 300 teachers in 200 classes.

According to Maya Kahanoff, of the Swiss Center for Conflict Research, Management, and Resolution at The Hebrew University, the Oslo process was mostly a "top-down program," involving primarily the political, diplomatic, and academic elites.

Less than 5% of Israelis and Palestinians ever actually participated in peace-related P2P activities. Yet, she maintains, even small numbers of P2P participants can have a positive effect on the region.

"Each year a few hundred teachers influence several hundred students. And all of them influence their families, friends, and communities. Eventually, the positive effects of these meetings will proliferate, even if it takes much longer than we had hoped."

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